Turns out sometimes you just need someone to ask, huh?

I am currently in a new-ish relationship (4 months) with someone and we decided to be primaries about a month ago. At the time we were both casually dating other folks - he, a couple of long-distance lovers who he sees semi-regularly due to work travel, and 1 local, and I, a few locals. I've since fallen pretty hard for one of the folks I have been seeing and have since cut out "casual" dates because the two people I'm crazy about take up so much energy and time.

The "primary" had some trouble with my new relationship and sometimes we communicate so well about it, but recently it has not been constructive at all . . . I find myself getting annoyed and snippy and mean, and probably mostly that has led us to take a step back.

The way I'm thinking of it now is that I'm my own primary again, which is how I've been, off and on, for a while and how I function best so far, I think.

Meh. This isn't all that clear. There's a lot to sort through. But he's traveling for a month starting tomorrow, so I will hopefully have some good "me" time to work some of this stuff out.

Anyway, in general, I just find it really comforting to read about other folks' poly trials and tribulations (and successes and wonderful things, too!) It makes me feel a little less crazy. Even though I live in the Bay Area I still feel a bit like a freak and it's good to know there are others like me. Particularly during challenging times.

Best, and thanks for asking,
m

thanks for the offer! I do know a good chunk of poly people, but I don't currently see a whole lot of real life examples of the lifestyle working out so well for those around me.

group info would be good. I may not necessarily jump in right away, because there is SO much going on right now, but I'd love to see who else is sanely making this stuff work!