"Why do you have mixed feelings?"

Hi thanks for all the responses. I think that my mixed feelings come from a few different things. First, as a dating site, PMM seems to represent a very small selection of people that I feel woluld make a "good match" for me. I realize that could change over time, but those that I did politely reach out to, just to say hello and make an introduction, didn't respond. I guess that made me feel kind of empty and wonder what I was doing in there at all. Y'know? I mean, you take the time and care to put together your personal profile, and then people shop you like you are a product on ebay, and just pass you by if you are not a match? . ; ) I am not sure... if that is a good or a bad thing. It was just new and foreign to me and my partner, and it made us both feel uneasy.

Ultimately, I think that we really weren't looking to get "hooked up" with someone, and the site seems to be geared more toward that. An interesting example of that is that although I had signed on a couple of weeks before she did, including a bio and nice photo, my wife's profile had been viewed 54 times, where mine had only been looked at 8 times. She hadn't even put in her picture. Now, I don't mean to sound jealous, it's not that, really. But, it gave me a pretty clear sense that there were a lot more men actively looking for women on PMM than there were women who were actively seeking men. My wife had been emailed by two men in the first week who had stumbled across her profile, and again, I was not emailed by anyone for the entire month that I was on. So, there's my little sob story.

In the end, we decided that a "matchmaker" site wasn't really how we wanted to meet people, and if we were feeling dissatisfyed with the site, it was probably because we weren't really into "shopping for friends" and the site is really geared more towards that kind of thinking. It's all good, just not for us. So, after just a little over a month we both deleted our profiles, and well, here we are. We both like it here in this tribe as we are really looking for a way to connect with our peers, and for a sense of community. It has already been giving us the kind of support that we feel that we need. This seems to be such a well rounded, and open minded community and folks are seeming to be very responsive and genuine. I really appreciate that.

Gratitude.

I've been on PMM, and I've had good and bad experiences. It has nothing to do with PMM though, just the particular people from there with whom I've gotten involved. Some people on there are realy cool, some are a bit whacked. Just like tribe.

I do like that it's almost all about dating, so it's a great place to meet people for that purpose. My first successful poly relationship started on PMM.

But it's also sparsely populated, with 4,000 or so members all over the country, good luck finding one close to you with whom you have much in common bedides just being poly.

And I've also found that a lot of the folks on there tend to be the ren faire, SCA, RPG, pagan types. Not that there's anything wrong with that mind you, and not something I'd ever hold against anybody. But it's not quite me either.

There's also a lot of people on there seeking polyfidelitous triads and stuff like that. Which again, though great for some, is not for me.

But hey, give it a shot. Basic membership is free. Log on. See who's on there. If you don't like it youo don't have to go back.

It's o.k., if you are American, but the member numbers are rather small. OKC has a lot more members but suffers from a couple of silly cows such as: goddamnitsomuch, youdontfoolme and pomelogranate who have taken to harassing us for their jollies.