It's not a good combination.
A good portion of my world just came crashing down last night. I discovered that not only has my now ex-sweetie been lying to me about his other partners, he's been lying to them about me. But he's also lied about aspects of the biz we're in together. One of the members of the board of directors for his non-profit (the one that's publishing my books and video documentaries and he is the executive director of) doesn't even know he's been named as a board member...and I highly doubt he knows that my ex-sweetie has been fucking his 23 year old daughter every week for the past 5 weeks either. What astounds me is that he was given a carte blanch hall pass to have other lovers anytime providing he's honest with them and me. They deserve to know he's in a relationship. right? (was)
Anyway, he took a number of my ideas and claimed them as his own to several people. He also took almost the entire amount of funding we'd received from one of my clients and used it for his own personal use-- on top of a $2000 loan I gave him and another $700 loan another lover gave him. We both lent him this money so he could pay his back rent and avoid being evicted. Yet, it never went to that and he got evicted anyway. The plan was for him to move in with me (this was before I discovered he was a pathological liar), so I cleared out the entire attic space, got an air conditioner and cleaned the carpets for his arrival...just wanted him to have a separate space of his own while going throgh this transition. Anyway, it turns out he's been telling people that he never actually intended on moving in with me, he just agreed to it to keep me happy. WTF?
I don't blame the poly lifestyle in any way for this, but I can't believe I got so entangled with someone who is seemingly incapable of being honest with anyone, even himself. Pathological liars and polyamory are just not a good combination, but leave it to me to find one. Fuck.
-K
A good portion of my world just came crashing down last night. I discovered that not only has my now ex-sweetie been lying to me about his other partners, he's been lying to them about me. But he's also lied about aspects of the biz we're in together. One of the members of the board of directors for his non-profit (the one that's publishing my books and video documentaries and he is the executive director of) doesn't even know he's been named as a board member...and I highly doubt he knows that my ex-sweetie has been fucking his 23 year old daughter every week for the past 5 weeks either. What astounds me is that he was given a carte blanch hall pass to have other lovers anytime providing he's honest with them and me. They deserve to know he's in a relationship. right? (was)
Anyway, he took a number of my ideas and claimed them as his own to several people. He also took almost the entire amount of funding we'd received from one of my clients and used it for his own personal use-- on top of a $2000 loan I gave him and another $700 loan another lover gave him. We both lent him this money so he could pay his back rent and avoid being evicted. Yet, it never went to that and he got evicted anyway. The plan was for him to move in with me (this was before I discovered he was a pathological liar), so I cleared out the entire attic space, got an air conditioner and cleaned the carpets for his arrival...just wanted him to have a separate space of his own while going throgh this transition. Anyway, it turns out he's been telling people that he never actually intended on moving in with me, he just agreed to it to keep me happy. WTF?
I don't blame the poly lifestyle in any way for this, but I can't believe I got so entangled with someone who is seemingly incapable of being honest with anyone, even himself. Pathological liars and polyamory are just not a good combination, but leave it to me to find one. Fuck.
-K
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Montana
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What a fucking son of a bitch.
The only thing that goes well with pathoogical liars is an enthusiatic knee to the balls.
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Man, what a mess, K. You have a good lawyer? If fo no other reason than to beat all your stuff back your way.
Time to start digging through every piece of documentation you have, every email, every note. 'Cause investors, they gonna be looking for blood and you want very, very clean hands.
As far as the personal stuff, that's also pretty yuck. I know a perspective can be a real chore at times, but think about, if you can, what HASN'T happened. No babies, no moved-in crap to dispose of, and (ah?) a heart only minimally broken.
And I'm not gonna deny that a swift kick to the jimmies ain't a great fantasy, either. 8)
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Unsu...
there are jerks everywhere, unfortunately. what a freaking [expletive]-from hell! do you have any legal leg to stand on? this cock can't steal all your stuff - ugh and to think of all the horrible things he led you on.... i'm so sorry. and i thought my weekend was bad, holy hell. well, just know that i feel like i'm getting screwed (only figuratively, alas) by life and people who i thought cared for me too. *hug*
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Hey, at least you have a ready-made room to rent to help you make back the cash?
I feel for you. I hemorrhaged away an embarrassing amount of money on a lover who simply never got his fire back. He lost the motivation to do anything, and I don't see him regaining it any time soon. No a lier, or he didn't mean to be, but ended up screwing me just as badly because he couldn't care enough not to. And, yeah, I've had the boys who lie even when all they have to do is tell me. I'll never understand that.
I don't think "pathological lier" is really a good combination with anything... other than maybe a fiction author... hmm.
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Dude. That totally sucks. Seriously. Close the doors and bar the windows, honey. He'll be back and at those moments and those times it will likely be a deciding point in your life whether you let him back into your life or you say 'fuck off I'm worth more than that.' Good luck. No one can ride the ride for you.
